Cheers, To A Positive Life!

 

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It has been long overdue since I’ve taken the time to write. I’ve been sulking in the shadows for too long, not realizing that not everything is so serious. Not everything needs careful analysis, and well, I have the tendency to be so negative. I forget to be lighthearted, to live in the moment, and live for the day. And so, on a positive note, it’s today and today, I will write.

“Life is short, too short to be taken too seriously. ” A 21 year-old has just taught me that. I find it amusing that I could attract a 21 year old, being that I am 30 years lived, nearly 10 years older than he. But either way, I’ll take the compliment.  I forgot what it was like to be so fresh, in thought, in life, in experience, in love. I don’t think his heart has ever been broken and he loves so willingly, unapologetically, and is unafraid. We should all love this way no matter how broken or beaten we may be.

Of course, I am not pursuing this, he is not my person, but I do find it so sweet to be courted by a very young boy, who walks me to my car, waits for me to cross the street, offers me a coat when I am cold, showers me with compliments, listens to every word I say, and buys me little things every once in a while. It’s sweet. Makes me feel like royalty and I very much like the feeling. hahah Guess, this boy came to my life to remind me of my worth. I am worth being treated lovingly, sweetly and gently. And I have never been treated this way. I have always just been a prize to be conquered or too naive to have fallen for someone who does not love me in return. I’ve been played like a game. But If I am treated like royalty, I’d reciprocate. Dare I say, I know now to wait for this, my prince, and king and no less.

I yearn for this- for this love my heart has been aching for all my life and I still have not found. But no more of this talk, I want to be happy. I want to be more positive and have a healthier outlook on life. I want to laugh, I want to dance, and sing, and joke, and not give a care in the world. I want to take midnight trips, and watch many sunsets, I want to sleep on the ocean and see some snow, go on day trip adventures to the desert and mountains and So, I will make more of an effort to go out with those who seek my company, say yes to life, rekindle my friendships and not take life too seriously. It’s time to say yes to a social life.

 

***Also, side note. I’ve been meaning to leave the social media world (for plenty of reasons of which I will share later) and hope to have more of a presence here instead. So, hope to be seeing you all more often.

 

All my best and as always, with love-

 

bluebird

 

 

California Poppy Fields

 

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Life should always be an adventure… no matter the means, your state of mind, the condition you might be in, or the limitations we might have. No excuses, just enjoy life as best you can.

As long as we have life, we are in the luxury of living it to the fullest. I am not always this enthusiastic, but it is my hope and aspiration to be.

This day to me was luxury at its finest. I sang, I danced, I walked, I laughed, and I felt so incredibly wild and free.

I could get used to this living thing.

 

With love, my babes-

 

your,

bluebird

 

 

 

To Happiness

Hi.

It’s been a while and I felt like writing. Whenever I need help discerning things, I write. It is my therapy, my lifeboat from a sea of emotions. This pen and I, we will always be. I have so much to voice about and this pen and I,  have a long journey ahead of us with a long tail of our past we are learning to haul around and live with. This pen will be the only true relationship I will have with me my whole life through. However long or short. It is the extension of my voice and an extension of me. The best me I can be and I want to be the best me I can be.

As of late, I  have been trying to enjoy my life. You know… live it up, seize the day, suck in all the juice of the day. And I’ll tell you, lately I have.

I am singing like a song bird. I am using my voice. I am raising my own plants. Speaking up like never before and enjoying my solitude. I love being a barista and making coffee. I love Los Angeles, the sun, my family, my people. I couldn’t ask for more. So yeah, its been too nice to be blue or cloudy lately.  I almost feel like a transformation of self… Almost like a metamorphoses of sorts. I feel myself transforming. Is that strange?

I think I have found and ending to my book… You see, I only write and have only written because I have been in pain, in sorrow. But you see why be in a lifeboat when I can swim in the sea? why walk when I can fly? why write, when I can sing? why live in a cacoon when I can be a butterfly with wings?

My voice is my instrument. It would be foolish of me to waste it. Even if it means failing. I know how to loose. I’ve lost so much already.  So I’d rather loose for something I am passionate about than to loose to something I don’t care for. This life is to be lived, to enjoy.  And how they say, “Tenemos que chupar el jugo del dia,” or “We need to suck the juice of the day, ” like the honeybee or the hummingbird.

So even if it means slaving away and living humbly. Making a living as a barista counting pennies and stretching money,  If I am happy, that is all that matters. The best adventures I have had been when I was penniless.

So let’s do it! let’s be happy. Here is to happiness and to our pursuits.

Cheers!

 

yours truly,

 

bluebird

 

 

 

Keep on, Dreaming on

I have lived very beautiful moments in my life. I forget all that I have lived. I’ve seen the sun mist morning pastures of Honduras in the early rise of the morning where I was woken up by the call of the rooster and the morning song of the birds. I spent hours upon hours laying on a hammock singing my favorite songs and dabbling with the guitar.  I have fallen asleep to the moonlit night in the wide open space, glazing at the mouth of the universe. I have seen a wave the size of Moby-Dick himself, threaten me with its omnipotence. And when I went winding up the hills of Italy, I wanted to kiss the foothills that have allowed me to behold its great beauty. I’ve seen the sunset of New Mexico against its red skin sand bleed in a blanket of warmth. I have many a moments when I have been humbled like a grain of sand and I had to swallow a lump of tears down my throat.

I have felt at times I’ve flown a car above the San Luis Obispo hills, high from society and I kid you not, it almost seemed like California cows were floating with the clouds. My life has been so full of dreams, so surreal, so lucid and so spectacular. I forget life is truly magical. Books can be written about the characters I’ve met. Shall I tell you about the Unicorn, Jack Nass or the French Traveler,  Pasqual? Should I tell you about the artist, the peacemakers, the dreamers, and the romantics?

I wish I did them all justice. Maybe one day but I have got to remember all that I have encountered to remind myself all that I am capable of.  Away, with my self-limiting habits!

Right now, I am the moth following the stream of light. I am dreamer looking for her dream… It is just a matter of time before I find the light.

Here is to wishing, waiting, to longing. Keep the fire burning, keep the light alive.  Keep on dreaming. Keep on dreaming on! Cheers.

 

your one and only,

 

bluebird

California Lavender

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I found this hue this morning lovely. It was an early morning crisp, a cool breath of air, under the greyish blue cloudless sky. Purple and grey go well together so I took a shot at it to try to capture the beauty I see before me.

It grows wild here on my commute to work, upon the hills, in many paths and crossways, including people’s yards if not tamed. They can grow like weeds.

I also love Lavender, there is so much one can do with lavender… lavender candles, soaps, scrubs, chocolates, even coffee I have just learned. Try a lavender latte. It’s so delicate.

It is all in the little things.

 

yours truly,

bluebird

 

p.s. I will be performing next wednesday at my local wine bar. Wish me luck!